MY SOCIAL NETWORKING PARANOIA

THE SOCIAL NETWORKING MAN

I am sitting at a table with a “senior-journalist”(things Ghanaians say) and we are both surfing the internet via free WI-FI and in between my endless downloads and his research he imparts some pearls of wisdom to me regarding the profession. Suddenly three familiar women(girls really, that I know from school) walk in and join us at the table. They know my very-chatty senior colleague so they started to chatter away, unpacked their lap-tops and commenced with the connection abuse(there is nothing “free-er” than free internet, well except…errr free food).

Apart from slowing my downloads they started to cackle and had one of those incoherent “chick-convo’s”(at this point I’m thinking just shut >insert-expletive< up already). My paranoia goes through the roof when one exclaims “so you are chatting with her too”(referring to the last member of the trio) at which point they all burst out laughing. This chatting online while sitting at the same table was not a one-off incident as I had the same experience with two Muslim chicks at that same place.

JUST BECAUSE I’M PARANOID, DOES’NT MEAN THEY ARE NOT OUT TO GET ME!

Since before Jesus, people have been gossiping but I fear social networking(technology) just took gossips to another level. What happened to personal face-to-face interaction or whispering something into a comrades’ ear. Honestly I felt they were chatting on Facebook and my “overly-inflated ego” tells me they were chatting about my “honourable self”.

I can take texting someone across a room so you don’t have to scream and look like a retard in a crowded room but I think it’s just plain rude when someone so-overtly talks or has a secret conversation in the midst of people. I think this was just karma getting back at me because I recall being at a bus-stop once with a female colleague of our not so noble species and checking my phone every two-seconds because it was a Champions-League night and Real were up against Barca she was quite pissed because “I wasn’t paying attention”.

“As electronics have gotten smarter and people have gotten stupider”(please feel free to quote me here) many have felt the need to update their statuses whilst crossing the road, read their WhatsApp messages in class or tweet nonsense when they are live on air reading prime-time news(true story) or at a press conference.

RESPECTFULLY, IMAGINE JUSTICE ATUGUBA CHECKING HIS TWITTER MENTIONS WHILST DELIVERING THE VERDICT!!!

In most cases, such conversations are not related to the issue at hand but rather very important topics like; the colour of the sky(STILL BLUE) or one of those enlightening conversations people start when they are inspired(e.g. ECG or GWCL , how about neither or maybe the AMA).

I am very much guilty of being too involved with my social networks(I get emotional whenever I lose a follower) but then so is almost everyone with a modern communications device but all I am saying is; we should all have some mutual respect for the people we interact with in-person because they are much more important than the guy who was asking about your “mastoids” on Twitter whilst you read the news.